The Hypocrisy of Excusing Some Peoples’ Misdeeds While Condemning Others’
Sexual Harassment In The News
Weekly Update 2017-12-07
Dear Members and Advocates,
As the days pass, the list of politicians, news anchors and other notable individuals accused of sexual misdeeds keeps growing. From award winning actors, to the President of the United States, this year has seen a huge increase in the number of sexual assault allegations levied against influential people.
At first came the disappointment. Not only that one of my favorite actor’s show was cancelled or that the politician whose views I most closely aligned with is being asked to resign, but disappointment in the person. How is it that someone that was so highly respected can do such a thing?
How is it that so many highly regarded people can be doing these things?
But as I thought more about it, a sense of relief came over me. Not in seeing other people’s failures, but through examining my own failures in the context of this list. In realizing that I am not alone in having made critical errors in judgment at one stage in life. Even though the lapse has cost me dearly, I now have a strong argument for not allowing the rest of my life to be defined by the ‘sex offender’ label.
You see; while there are some on the list who are serial abusers, others committed their misdeeds years, or decades ago and have gone on to have incredibly successful careers doing wonderful service to their communities. Why can’t I?
As I listen to people vilifying some and defending others, I am paying attention to the arguments. “Well he did this all the time, but the other guy only did this once”, “That was so long ago… a different stage of life”, “consider all the good he’s done in the years since, he’s clearly redeemed himself”, “he didn’t actually hurt anyone”, “It was just ‘locker room talk’ he denies doing that”.
If people are able to see the distinctions among these people, why do they treat all registrants the same? If people are able to recognize that some great people have committed “one off” bad deeds, but it should be examined in the context of a life of otherwise good deeds, why don’t they do the same for registrants? If certain people can be forgiven and redeemed, why can’t I?
It’s our hope that as more of these stories unfold and the public sees that offenders are not just nameless people, but someone they have highly regarded, they will be able to see the distinctions, recognize that everyone is fallible and see that lapses in judgment long ago do not preclude a life of contributions to follow.
Sincerely,
The Florida Action Committee
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This article has great intentions, but the other side of the coin of “he or she was once respected” has become “All I see now is a creep. ” In particular, there was an article just yesterday 12/6 which explored this about Matt Lauer. Basically the sentiment was why did his picture 2 days ago make me think great thoughts about him but today I only see the creepy side. Unfortunately, like superstitions, urban legends, or bad facts, once someone’s mind is made up, it’s hard to change it back. A great experiment for this would be to find someone who committed a heinous crime bit has become successful after prison. Showcase their good deeds on a talkshow, get audience opinions, questions, etc, then drop the bombshell and watch opinions go dark. It’s basic human psychology and it’s sad we haven’t evolved beyond the mob mentality of the court of public opinion, which NEVER has all the facts at hand and is almost always wrong. A grand jury has most of the facts and they could indict a ham sandwich.
People have always been able to use critical judgement and see distinctions in all things. But FAC and others in the movement have been unwilling to fully understand that. We have championed ALL people on the registry,refusing to make distinctions and the public has always been able to see through that and have been rightly skeptical of our intentions. I have long tried to encourage a more definite stand that indeed says, “You see; while there are some on the list who are serial abusers, others committed their misdeeds years, or decades ago and have gone on to have incredibly successful careers doing wonderful service to their communities.” We have been Defenders of all people on the sex offender registry including the “serial abusers” and our public image and hence our ability to effect change has suffered as a result.
I felt so passionate about this very subject that I finally insisted on speaking with Gail personally regarding our inability to offer distinctions between serial abusers and those who just messed up. This happened a few years ago and i’m afraid it fell on deaf ears.
People ARE able to use judgement and distinction but have not been willing to risk more lenient treatment towards serial abusers in the process. We ourselves have been unwilling to separate the truly dangerous from the rest in our public statements and activism and the public has always been suspect of that.