Honoring Fathers, Father Figures and Family
Weekly Update for 2023-06-16-ID#262.
Dear Members and Advocates,
Today we celebrate Father’s Day, a day honoring one’s father, or relevant father figure, as well as fatherhood, paternal bonds, and the influence of fathers in society. For several years, FAC has described the laws in FL as being “anti-family” laws as they force families apart, break paternal bonds, and alienate fathers especially from being a relevant figure in their children’s lives. That is exactly what the laws do on the surface, but fortunately there are men (fathers and male figures) who refuse to accept the forced separation and have taken the necessary steps to reunite with their children, to build bonds within their family, and to strengthen their family unit. They are living proof that “where there is a will, there is a way.” That is the message of this Weekly Update and we all need to practice this to our fullest ability.
While on probation, time and contact with one’s children may be restricted by the rules of probation unless you have taken the steps to develop a safety plan with a qualified therapist, and in agreement with your probation officer. YES, it can be done, and has been done successfully. If you are on probation, ask your therapist about a safety plan that will enable you to have the appropriate contact with your children, grandchildren, nieces and nephews or other family members. Ask for the ability to take them to school and attend their events. The school staff, coaches, dance teachers, karate sensei, etc will often agree to support your involvement with your child once they know you and realize the lengths you are going through to be part of their lives. They begin to see YOU as that exceptional parent who wants to be present out of the desire to be part of their lives, as opposed to the parent that is there out of an obligation and would rather be someplace else.
When you are no longer on probation, the time you spend with your family, children, or father figures in your life is completely up to you. That may sound harsh to some who feel they have no control, but it really is up to you and the level of effort that you apply to make it happen, to take control. Fathers are not necessarily blood relatives; children are not necessarily your off-spring. Family begins with respect for and appreciation of others no matter how old, how young, where they come from, what they’ve experienced, where they are, how capable they are, how healthy they are, or who they love. Family extends to an individual’s choice of who they call family – what intentional, meaningful relationships they form. Our value of family extends to community, and to sisterhood and brotherhood. Although we are united by this value, family and fatherhood means something different to each of us. If you look, you are certain to find a family or a father figure within FAC, too.
Who is the man in your life that has been a positive influence and source of encouragement? Are you a man that is a positive influence to others? Is there something that you want to change in your life? How strong is your will?
I think of how my life would have been very different without my father’s influence. He taught me “where there is a will, there is a way, AND the only time you fail is when you don’t try.” His words have resonated with me all of my life. That simple lesson got me through challenges that seemed impossible; it enabled me to be creative, achieve goals, and most of all, it taught me to look at life from all angles. On the day that my father retired from Westinghouse, where he operated a crane for 35 years, he received a pen and pencil set as his retirement gift. I was shocked, “That’s all you got? After all your hard work? A lousy pen and pencil set?” My father laughed and said to me “Is that what you see, a box with a pen and pencil? I see the house that I built for our family. I see the summer vacations. I see the sled-rides and hot cocoa days that we enjoyed together when the mill shut down for the two-week paid holiday season every year. I see all of those things that were made possible because of the job.” Then he handed me the box and said “You take this pen and pencil set as a reminder that you have the ability to write your own future.”
My father never let anything stand in his way of achieving a goal. When he did not agree with the way his taxes were being used for the school athletics, he ran for School Board, won the election, and even served as President (it was 20 years later that he decided he would get his GED at age 70). When he saw young boys turned away from Little League baseball try-outs, he started a new team and gave every player their time at bat. When he wanted to bring the sport of Bocce to Florida, he convinced the city to build state-of-the-art courts. He promised the city that “If you build it, they will come” and started a league that has been going strong for nearly 30 years. The city recently expanded to the courts that have been dedicated to my father, and they installed a large bronze plaque telling the story of the man that started it all. Indeed, where there is a will, there is a way.
Be an example of strong will and encouragement to yourself and others. Remember that the only time you are defeated is when you don’t try.
Sincerely,
The Florida Action Committee (FAC)
ANNOUCEMENTS
NARSOL Annual Conference in Houston TX Jun 22-25. If you are attending, please email membership@floridaactioncommittee.org or call 833-273-7325 Option 1. You can also sign-up for the Live Stream available at https://secure.narsol.org/conference-signup-live-stream/. For more details visit https://conference.narsol.org/
NEW FAC Research Team – first meeting is Wed Jun 21 at 8pm by phone. Call 760-548-9898 to learn more and participate in the next research project. If you have any problem connecting for free, you can text CALL ME to 760-548-9898 for a call back from Free Conference Call and you will be connected to the meeting at no charge.
Monthly Membership Call – Thu July 6 at 8pm ET. 319-527-3487. Topic TBD
New Member Orientation Call – Thu July 13 at 8pm ET. 319-527-3487. NO Agenda. Call in to learn more about the organization, volunteer opportunities, where to find support, get resources and referrals, or just share information. If you have any problem connecting for free, you can text CALL ME to 319-527-3487 for a call back from Free Conference Call and you will be connected to the meeting at no charge.
Family Support Group – Sat July 8 from 11am-1pm. By Invitation only for non-registered family members with loved ones on the Registry. Must be an FAC member. To participate, contact membership@floridaactioncommittee.org or call 833-273-7325, Option 1.
Women’s Group for WFR [Women Forced to Register] starting soon. For details and more information, contact Danell at fac.region4b@gmail.com or leave message at 772-494-1947.
MEET and GREETS
Sat Jul 29 -Apopka, noon-3pm. RSVP to membership@floridaactioncommittee.org or call 833-273-7325,Option 1.
Sun Jul 30 – Hernando County – 2-4pm RSVP to hernandoFACcoord@gmail.com or call 352-606-0187
Sat Aug 5-Clearwater – 1-3pm -RSVP to fac.region6a@gmail.com or call 217-218-2749.
Sat Aug 12-Citrus County-2-5pm RSVP to membership@floridaactioncommittee.org or leave message at 833-273-7325 Option 1.
Sat Aug 19-Highlands County- 11am-2pm RSVP to Morris at fac.highlands2@gmail.com or leave message at 863-256-3026
Support Staff Needed- If you have some time and want to be more involved, email membership@floridaactioncommittee.org or call 833-273-7325,Option 1.
Staff Writers are needed for articles, posts and Weekly Updates. If you have a story, article or topic of interest to share, please submit it to media@floridaactioncommittee.org
Membership Communications – Return phone calls and emails from members seeking information. Training provided.
PenPal Communications – Respond to letters from inmates seeking information and support. Training provided.