Member Submission: Post-Conviction Traumatic Stress
The interrogation by police that I received was extreme. It began about 6:30 in the morning when I awakened in bed by a room full of police. I have reason to believe that several had their guns drawn. After dressing, with most of the officers present, I was taken downstairs, where I found a solid wood door had been destroyed by the police when they gained entrance to our home. For more than four hours I was asked hundreds of questions, which I struggled to answer because I had only slept for four hours. There was no food, Not even a drink of water, and I was so frightened that I forgot to go to the bathroom. Afterward my lawyer told me that he had seen this sort of interrogation beforeâwhen he was stationed in Afghanistan this was the method used with terrorists.
As a college teacher, I was decimated by the experience. For a year or more I had flashbacks in which the police came barging into my home. I moved to the basement of the house for greater safety, but still I heard noises of what I thought were the police invading my home again. One night I thought I heard the garage door go up and the car being started and driving away. I got up and checked, but the car was still there. I wrote down the many flashbacks and disturbing images I had even when awake at night. This seemed very real.
I was seeing a therapist at the time on a voluntary basis. I described some of what I was experiencing and asked for help. She informed me she didnât do that kind of therapy. With my doctorate in psychology, and having taught abnormal psychology for several years, I wondered if this was something like post traumatic stress disorder, what some in the military experience once they are home and safe. They will experience the trauma of the battlefield at home, much as they did overseas. This is a problem for those who have been highly traumatized by life-threatening experiences. Could it be that I was having symptoms of PTSD, not because of terrible war experiences, but because of the invasion of my home by police officers.
Then I was placed upon the sex offender registry, and given monitoring devices. I was told to avoid many places that children could theoretically congregate, but also be vigilant in everyday life and avoid being near children. This included taking an alternative aisle in a store if there was a child near the products I needed. I should carefully watch for children when walking down the street, crossing the road and walking on the other side if I saw a child on my side of the street. I must drive on alternate roads to avoid driving by schools. In short, I was taught by my therapist and later by a probation officer to become phobic of children. I thought constantly about this avoidance, which required me to think far more about children than I had before. Did the requirements of the probation officer and my therapist, as well as those of being on the sex offender registry, add to the PTSD symptoms? After more than a year of such symptoms, during which I began vigilant avoidance of children, I concluded I was worse. But we was there anything in the textbooks and research that confirmed this?
In the year 2020 Danielle Harris and Jill Levenson were published in the International Journal of Offender Therapy and Comparative Criminology under the subtitle âpost-conviction traumatic stress in men convicted of sexual offenses.â I obtained a copy of the research report and found that these researchers had identified experiences much like mine in other registrants. The problems are many for registrants, many of them created by poorly designed laws that have little or no research evidence to support them. The disconnect, the fear, and the stigma by themselves can induce trauma. The authors see these reactions as a disorder that closely approximates PTSD, a new disorder they describe as âpost-conviction traumatic stress.â Symptoms include thoughts that intrude, negative thoughts and emotions, avoidance, and hypervigilance (constantly in an anxious state where you are looking for evidence of harm). These symptoms are believed to be related to aspects of every phase of the criminal justice system.
Anxiety and feelings of helplessness begin to characterize the personâs life, making it difficult to connect experiences and emotions. Attempts at adapting to the environment bring unhealthy thinking about the world, others in life, and themselves. Re-experiencing the trauma, avoiding situations that could trigger such reactions, and maladaptive coping can develop (such as addiction and criminal activities). Being accused of a sex crime, arrest, incarceration, and sex offender registration are life-altering events, producing a sense of powerlessness and fear. In short, it can be traumatic.
Harris and Levenson point out that those who are convicted of sex crimes were often mistreated in childhood (I was sexually abused by a neighbor). This disorder is associated with family estrangement, lack of adequate employment, housing changes, isolation, and other sources of significant stress. Social stigma is not only directed to registrants but also to their families. These problems can be traced to the adversarial court system, incarceration, and a correctional system that lacks an understanding of trauma. Incarceration is associated with nightmares and unwanted thoughts, being easy to startle, avoiding crowds, being detached emotionally, and paranoia.
Such stress can influence people to commit additional crimes, as the former inmate experiences social injustice, a sense of helplessness, and sometimes a desire for vengeance. The person is labeled by society, producing shame, isolation, and a sense of hopelessness. Being on the registry, known by many because of its public nature on the Internet, reinforces the identity of deviance and thus encourages future criminal actions. These influences, in turn, make it more difficult to secure basic human needs for self and family, and in turn communicate that whatever achievement is accomplished can quickly be taken away.
In their study of 74 men, incarcerated for sexual offenses, Harris and Levenson discovered a concern for safety from the police, people who would accuse them falsely, vigilantes, and dangers from living on the streets. Many felt socially disconnected, and experienced lack of contact with children, friends, and family. It was difficult to find a job. Many spoke of the loss of opportunities, dreams and hopes for the future.
The researchers found that all four diagnostic categories associated with post traumatic traumatic stress disorder were common: thoughts or mental images that intruded, avoidance of people and situations that produce distress and isolation (due to fear of being wrongly accused), negative beliefs about other people or self, and a sense of constant danger, less interest in activities, constant vigilance; continual scanning for signs of danger, and sleep problems.
Some react by traumatic coping, in which the above characteristics are accentuated and obsessiveness with obeying laws is prominent. Planning for the future is replaced with an emphasis upon the here and now. The authors conclude that this form of coping is ultimately ineffective.
In contrast, resilient coping involves a greater acceptance of their situation, and the motivation to see reform. Those who are better educated are more likely to use this form of coping. But even these men are worried about incidental contact that would mistakenly get them into trouble.
The research concludes that the crucial aspect of trauma in the corrections process calls for changes to the oppressive and disempowering activities of corrections and courts. Treatment must be trauma-informed as well as encourage community adjustment and a more positive identity. They note that faith-based programs, 12 step programs, and trauma-based treatment can encourage needed acceptance and belonging. Levenson proposed the acronym SHARE as central to successful therapy: (1) safety (2) help (3) autonomy (4) respect and (5) empathy
My offense dates back to 1998, a victimless crime, when I was first arrested, it was my first offense, so I was in complete shock. Everyone I knew abandoned me, my wife, with my son, every friend I knew, My family was my biggest support. when I spent the night in jail, and I returned home, I was alone, I was petrified. ANY knock on the door sent my heart racing, constant fear. I kept considering suicide, I decided to find some help and met a Psychiatrist. He let me talk, and I explained everything to him and he listened to everything I told him. Fast forward 6 months, I decided to plead no contest, in return I would do probation for 5 years. The judge ordered that I not be on the sex offender registry, the only requirements were not to own a personal computer and not be with anyone under 18 except my own children while on probation. Well probation refused the Judges orders and made their own, and it was hell. I feared everything, the warrant less searches were the worst, the harassment, the loss of jobs, housing, security, I no longer felt like a normal human being. I was isolated from everything. To this day, I still see the same doctor, because I would be dead without him. Move forward to 2002, I was constantly under stress and fear, Oct 30th 2002 at the age of 40, I suffered my first massive heart attack, and was dead for 10 minutes, on life support four days. In total, because of my PTSD, I have had 7 heart attacks. I live with a pacemaker/defibrillator in my chest. in 2010, I married again to my European Girlfriend, we were really happy together, we tried for 8 years for her to get her Green card, but we were denied, because of my past, (almost impossible to marry a foreigner. I dont control my life anymore, only the state controls me, where I live, what I drive, where I go, who I can marry, they have all the control. There is so much more to all of this, but trying not to bore you. I have been Diagnosed with PTSD since 1998, but it means nothing to the state, they could care less, because in their eyes, I am nothing but scum
One popular view is that registrant PTSD is appropriate and good.
âYour victim suffered PTSD; why shouldnât you feel it also?â
Or even, âyou intended to do something that would have caused PTSD; why shouldnât you feel it so you learn your lesson?â
Or even, âyou were a participant in contributing to someoneâs PTSD; shouldnât you feel it as a reminder to refrain from that activity?â
Or (directed at family members), âIâm so sorry, but the fault lies entirely with your loved one for causing you to have to go through this.â
Sometimes these are strongly-held beliefs; more often they are just assumptions made by the vast majority that have no experience with the registry.
FAC tends to be a safe place for registrants and their families to share experiences. But thereâs an inherent tension between that role and FACâs mission of educating the public.
Without minimizing sex convictions, have any FAC members successfully persuaded someone who holds the above position(s), to soften their position? Have you ever persuaded someone that registrant PTSD, contrary to their prior assumptions, is unjustified? If so, how?
One thought I havenât tested: PTSD probably increases oneâs risk to re-offend. And no one wants that, right?
I realize that raising the above discussion question wonât win me many friends. We just have to remind ourselves how people think outside our bubble, and what weâre up against.
I understand all the PTSD aspects of this. 32 years of threats, homelessness, joblessness, and loneliness. Constant probation violations for not crossing a “T” or dotting an “I”. Being transferred from one county to another sitting in jail waiting to find out about the violation and the probation officer never comes to court. Realesed and stuck trying to find a ride home back to the county I now live in, and driving my friends crazy looking for help to get home, once again. Then returning home and ordered to check in with the probation officer who violated me, only to have her look me in the face and say: “Who are you?” Months and months of doing this, for years. Wears a person thin, and soon you are alone and run out of friends. Because, they cannot handle it anymore.
1989 was the original charge, falsely accused do to your sexuality, by a bigot of a family member. Nine months in jail on hearsay charge no evidence, no nothing but hearsay. The judge would ask my sister about her thoughts on my being gay, and she would scream and cry, and out of the courtroom she would be carried. Judge was on my side, yet, eighteen and very afraid, and then raped and beaten, I jumped the gun out of fear and took a plea bargain. I just wanted it over. Because I had bitten on of the rapists, they were given the option to press charges on me and the officers basically said I brought it on myself. 13 years probation. Because of all the crap with vengeful probation officers, I was finally released in 2001. 2006 was placed on registry. Simple then of course, but not a wanted task. Violated for being homeless and placed on four more years. probation.
Bounced around with no job and no home until 2010. Found a nice house and great people who gave me chance. Worked for their company and they treated me as family. Been there since. Put on disability in 2010, due to compound PTSD. Still do not trust a soul, flashbacks, fear. The list goes on.
2014, tried to help someone I met online because I understood his situation. Been there, done that and as a kind hearted person, I thought I was doing good. No. He was dangerous and liked his drugs and his control. Stole, threatened me and on occasions best the crap out of me and threatened my friends. He once held me up against a wall and told me he would kill me when ever he wanted and would spend the rest of his life destroying me. The police were of no help and they shrugged it off. After running out of money taking care of him and a few friends standing up against his abuse and grifting nature, I got rid of him. Plus, he tried to set me on fire while I was sleeping. He even hid the smoke alarm under his mattress, so it would not warn me. If it wasn’t for my cats, I probably wouldn’t be here. He got a hold of my phone, got my contacts and proceeded to tell everyone horrible things about me and I was defenseless. He went to all my neighbors and told them every lie he could think of. Fast forward eight years later and he is back with a vengeance. My house has been broken into numerous times, my life threatened by my neighbors. My property damaged. Policed called and now it happens so often, the police just laugh at me. My alarms have been cut, wifi hacked and I left by job after a year due to threats against my life and just plain harassing innuendos. Plus, the neighbors want me out of the house so bad, that the police constantly follow me and now anything with a siren and I mean anything, harass me as I drive, no matter where I am. Phone, email and texts all monitored. Stalked by all my neighbors at all times of day. They tell me what I say on the phone, what I am doing in my house, where things are in my house. How do I prove the truth when no one wants to hear it? Move you say? Where, how and where is the magical pot of endless money? It’s like the law and these people are going to harass me and stalk me into suicide or false confessions. What do I do? My landlords are somewhat on my side. The wife cares, the husband wants me gone. I do not have funds or the ability to run. Suicide……it is almost the next option, hell no one wants the real truth. As I said, eight years later and he has come back with a vengeance. Why, because I have a label and who on Earth is going to believe me? Alone I stand.
If an article states something attracts children the village pheasants will believe it. Would having leftovers on your front stoop attract children also or just feral cats with other wildlife? How about watching Peanutâs Holiday specials blasting from your tv? Children need to protected from helicopter parents because they are taking their childrenâs innocence away based on fear.
Jed….maybe not you….but for many folks….it is a real issue.
Me, as a combat veteran, (2 x Iraq Deployments) and 100% disabled for Chronic PTSD, I identify those PCSD with my PTSD. Matter fact, I believe I suffer from that as well, because I get terrified when the bell rings and I quickly think that the guys in green are coming for me.
You see, when you spend over 2 years of your life in a shithole that many bad guys that doesn’t know you but wants to behead you and stomp on your corpse, you tend to believe that there is nothing out there that scares you…but I found out the hard way that there are folks that are scarier than some ragtag insurgents in a shithole place.
So yes, those symptoms are real and the pain you feel when you go through it it is real.
I think I was misunderstood. I was trying to say in a sort of sarcastic way that all the horrible events this man went through is the same we all went through.
The busting in the door with a team of SWAT cops, weapons drawn ore dawn, while we are all sleeping and in bed clothes, if any at all.
The thousand questions that only the answers they want that are being recorded. The impossible regulations to stay away from kids even at wal mart.
I was trying to imply that this is the norm for an arrest and conviction. Nothing new here. Same thing we all went through. It is standard procedure with law enforcement. They could care less about our PTSD, sadly.
“I get terrified when the bell rings and I quickly think that the guys in green are coming for me.” Sir, you’re not alone. I disconnected my door Belk because it was so traumatic. The only visitors I get are probation officers and deputies who do their residency checks. Now they all have to call me in advance. It gives me a feeling of power over my own life. This is how I adapted.
I also disconnected my doorbell. LE can’t even see my property let alone access it without calling first now. đ